BONKERS! 1999: The Final Season
SEVEN DAYS IN THE VALLEY
"DAY 1: DARKWING FOREVER?"
Characters (C) WALT DISNEY STUDIOS
(save of course Captain Eric Skewer
and those that belong to others like WB et al.)
Original Story by SUSHIL RUDRANATH
FOR PRIVATE USE ONLY, NOT ENDORSED BY DISNEY,
DON'T SUE ME, I'M A NICE GUY.
(And I stay true to the characters!)
DISTRIBUTE FREELY SO LONG AS NO CHANGES ARE MADE AND THIS
NOTICE REMAINS INTACT
NOTE: This story is set in the sixth(?) season of Bonkers! It, and the six
that follow, are closely linked, and mark the arc that will end, at least
for me, Bonkers!. This story is a bit less "funny" than I would have liked,
but it sets up themes and things for the others (which will be funnier, I
swear) to follow. It marks the next giant pratfall downwards in a
continuity similar to that of Doctor Who: The New Adventures or Babylon 5.
Oh, and Darkwing Duck fans... (I'm one, too, y'know) erm... my apologies.
TEASER
OVERLAY TITLE: December 24th, 1999
FADE IN
FAWN DEER stands in the center of a dark alley filled with steam.
PUSH IN on her EYES as they dart back and forth quickly.
PULL BACK as she jumps upwards-- just as two THUGS run towards her from
screen left and screen right!
FAWN kicks them both with her legs as she comes down! The thugs drop,
birdies flying over their heads. FAWN lands in front of them, crouched.
Standing up, she turns to them and bows. Then she turns to face the screen.
FAWN DEER
Thank you, Master Willari!
Your Deer Kun Doe lessons really
paid off!
VO: DUCK JONES yells out
DUCK JONES
Cut! Print it! That's a Wrap, people!
PULL BACK to show FAWN, the THUGS and the alley located on a moderate-sized
soundstage. DUCK JONES runs onto the set to congratulate FAWN. He shakes
her hand.
DUCK JONES
Fawn! That was great work, kid!
As usual, another great commercial
from the world's most famous TV
spokesmodel!
FAWN is embarassed at the attention.
FAWN
Really, D.J.-- It wasn't anything.
I'm just glad for the work.
DUCK JONES
Will you be joining us for the
Christmas Eve Party later tonight?
FAWN
You bet! I just have to go get
Bonkers. You know him-- he's
always forgetting things like
this.
DUCK JONES
Well don't take too long, kid.
Everybody wants to meet the
star of the hour!
FAWN nods and heads towards a door marked "EXIT." She EXITS the studio.
WIDE ANGLE SHOT of the outside of the studio. The Door opens, spilling
light into a dark alleyway much like the one from the commercial. FAWN
steps out, a small figure in relation to the alley. It is dark and damp,
and puddles of water are everywhere on the ground.
PUSH IN to a puddle of water that is moving slowly towards FAWN. It is
almost silvery, like the liquid T-1000 from Terminator 2.
FAWN is walking down the alleyway, her feet stepping in puddles as she
goes. PUSH in on her feet as they splash through puddle after puddle,
coming ever closer to the metallic one...
FAWN steps in the puddle. It rises up, beginning to cover her leg!
PULL BACK as FAWN is surrounded by the metallic water, which swirls around
her like a coil, the top of which forms into LIQUIDATOR'S head!
LIQUIDATOR
Hey Hey Hello, my pretty!
FAWN tries to jerk back, but LIQUIDATOR's got her surrounded!
PULL BACK to a WIDE ANGLE SHOT. Out of the darkness, NEGADUCK appears,
holding something in a piece of cloth.
NEGADUCK
Well, if it isn't the fabulously
famous Fawn Deer-- heartthrob to
millions, and prized princess of
one Wackytoons studio.
NEGADUCK unwraps the cloth, unveiling a glowing toon Eraser. He is careful to
hold the Eraser with a bit of the cloth.
I've got a Christmas present for you...
LIQUIDATOR, like a spring, bounces FAWN closer to Negaduck. He holds the
Eraser dangerously close to her face.
NEGADUCK
Ahh, the sweet scent of vengeance.
Five years ago Duck Jones kicked me
out of my job, and tonight, I'm gonna
repay the favor! First I'll rub out his
most famous female star, then the man
himself, and then finally his legacy--
the entire studio! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Suddenly, a hissing noise is heard! Purple Smoke fills much of the alley!
NEGADUCK turns, brushing Fawn's shoulder with the Eraser! She collapses
as LIQUIDATOR uncoils himself and follows Negaduck.
Out of the cloud of smoke, we see
DARKWING DUCK
I am the terror that flaps in the night!
I am--
NEGADUCK hurls the Eraser at DARKWING!
NEGADUCK
--DEAD!
The ERASER hits DARKWING, who barely has time to react as he turns into a
black and white drawing, then a pencil sketch, and finally nothing as he
vanishes. NEGADUCK carefully picks up the ERASER with the cloth. SIRENS
can be heard in the background.
NEGADUCK
Drat! The Cops! Come on, Liquidator!
AERIAL SHOT of Negaduck running off, LIQUIDATOR trailing behind as a puddle
of water, and Fawn lying in the alley, on her side. There is but a wisp of
smoke where Darkwing Duck once stood. The door to Wackytoons studio opens,
spilling light onto Fawn. DUCK JONES can be seen sticking his head out of
the door and calling for Fawn.
RUN OPENING THEME
ACT I
CUT TO EXT. CITY HALL - DAYTIME
MAYOR KANIFKY is standing behind a podium, addressing a large crowd of
spectators, many of whom are sobbing, crying, and holding up Darkwing
Duck posters.
KANIFKY
(sobbing)
We are all gathered here today to
mourn the passing of one of Hollywood's
greatest heroes... Darkwing Duck.
The crowd wails.
Ahem... Once a TV star, then a vigilante,
and finally a duly deputized officer of
the law, the Dark Warrior against crime
will not be forgotten--
The crowd sobs.
--as I, Mayor Leonard Kanifky, declare
today, December 25th, 1999 to be
Darkwing Duck day!
The crowd cheers halfheartedly.
PULL BACK to reveal all this being shown on a beat-up television set mounted
in the side of a support beam in the 34th Precinct. The station is different
now than it was 6 years ago. The paint is cracked and peeling everywhere,
paperwork is strewn over every desk, and there are far fewer cops around than
in the old days. Those who remain wear Navy Blue uniforms with oval silver
badges, like the rest of the LAPD. SGT. MIRANDA WRIGHT is watching LT.
GRATING as he reacts to KANIFKY'S speech.
GRATING
(restrained anger)
I can't believe somebody took out
Darkwing Duck.
MIRANDA
Nobody knows who did it, Frank.
The only witness is still at
Von Drake's.
GRATING
Bobcat there with her?
MIRANDA
Yup.
GRATING
Well, you better get down
there and see how things are
going. Then, you and Bonkers
get on this case and GET ME
SOME SUSPECTS!
MIRANDA
On my way!
MIRANDA grabs a jacket and heads out. GRATING is watching a retrospective
of Darkwing's career on the TV screen. It gets cut off by a commercial for
McDuck Enterprises' Wackytoons Studio. DENNIS is walking behind GRATING.
GRATING
(sotto)
Everything wrong with this
town started with that studio.
DENNIS stops.
DENNIS
How's that, Lieutenant?
GRATING
Back in the late eighties, those
guys would put out a show and keep
it going one, two, maybe even three
years at a time. Toons were happy,
the public was happy. Then they started
cancelling 'em every year, even if the
public wanted more. What'd we get from
that? Bonkers is a cop. Darkwing Duck a
vigilante, Negaduck an arch criminal,
and kids who think Schnookums and Meat
are all there is to quality entertainment!
DENNIS
Well, that's one way to look at it,
I guess...
GRATING points to his lieutenant's stripes.
GRATING
No, Dennis. That's the ONLY way to
look at it.
He stares at the screen.
GRATING
(sotto)
Or maybe not...
CUT TO AN ABANDONED WAREHOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
NEGADUCK and the other members of the Syndicate- BUSHROOT, LIQUIDATOR,
MEGAVOLT and QUACKERJACK are watching the same ad for Wackytoons studio.
NEGADUCK
(ranting)
Everything wrong with this
town started with that studio!
QUACKERJACK rolls his eyes. MEGAVOLT sticks his finger in a light socket.
LIQUIDATOR is pouring himself between two glasses. BUSHROOT, who has the
Eraser under a microscope, looks up at NEGADUCK.
BUSHROOT
Don't you think that you've
carried this grudge thing
a little too long?
NEGADUCK turns and faces BUSHROOT, glaring. His face is beet red.
NEGADUCK
(ballistic)
I *THINK* YOU HAD BETTER
FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE ME
SOME LIQUID ERASER AND FAST,
BROCCOLI-FACE!
BUSHROOT
I already told you, O
Fearless Leader, that we need
a powerful supercomputer to
deconstruct the sub-molecular
formula of the Eraser so that
we can reconstitute a--
NEGADUCK
FINE, FINE!
(calms a bit)
So you need a computer. What
about the one we stole last
week?
QUICK CUT TO A HAL 9000 UNIT
HAL
I'm sorry, Bushroot. I
can't let you do that.
BUSHROOT is locked outside the warehouse, standing precipitously on a
ledge.
BUSHROOT
Open the Warehouse window, HAL.
HAL
I'm afraid I can't do that.
BUSHROOT
(screaming)
HAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
CUT BACK TO THE WAREHOUSE
NEGADUCK
So it was a little nuts, so what?
QUACKERJACK holds up a tattered MR. BANANNA BRAIN puppet.
QUACKERJACK
Mr. Bananna Brain still hasn't
recovered from that nasty case
of explosive decompression,
have you, Mr. Bananna Brain?
MR. BANANNA BRAIN shakes his head, which plops off shortly thereafter,
revealing Quackerjack's hand sticking up through the puppet. QUACKERJACK
shrieks and goes after the puppet head.
NEGADUCK
Alright ALREADY! We'll get another
computer! The late, *great* Darkwing
Dork had some kinda setup he'd use
to stay one step ahead of the
lesser criminals (i.e. YOU guys),
so that should be our target.
LIQUIDATOR pauses in mid pour from one glass to another. He looks like a
little tidal wave suspended in midair. He is in front of a window, outside
of which can be seen the GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE.
LIQUIDATOR
But where could his hideout possibly
be?
NEGADUCK
Dunno. We'll have to comb the city,
maybe even the state. We'll get right
on it as soon as we send Toontown a
little message...
CUT TO LUDWIG VON DRAKE'S LABORATORY
FAWN DEER is lying on a bed, her arm almost faded out where the Eraser had
touched her. BONKERS is staring down at her sadly. LUDWIG VON DRAKE is busy
mixing up formulas.
BONKERS
Fawn... can you tell me anything
about what happened last night?
FAWN
(weakly)
Negaduck...
BONKERS
Negaduck's back in town!?
VON DRAKE walks over to BONKERS and jabs him in the ribs.
VON DRAKE
(whispering)
Ashk her vat did zis to her.
BONKERS
She just said 'Negaduck'!
VON DRAKE
Don't be schilly, boy. Dat vas de
whoo, not the vhat!
BONKERS
Fawn... vhat did zis-- I mean, what
did this to you?
FAWN
E--
BONKERS leans closer. MIRANDA walks in.
FAWN
Eraser... glowing...
FAWN passes out.
MIRANDA
A glowing Eraser?
VON DRAKE
Oh boy... zis does not look good.
Not good at all, lemmetellya!
MIRANDA
What do you mean?
VON DRAKE rifles through some books in his library. MIRANDA leans over to
pick up a strange looking device on a table. VON DRAKE spins around.
VON DRAKE
Don't touch zat!
MIRANDA jerks her hand away.
VON DRAKE
Dat iz a Time Remote. Very Experimental, und
very not finished yet! In ze wrong hands, it
could be very dangerous!
BONKERS
(hopefully)
Could we use it to go back in time
and save Fawn?
VON DRAKE
It's not finished yet, bobcat!
Besides, it would take me six days
to complete dat, and poor Fawn here...
BONKERS
Poor Fawn WHAT?!
VON DRAKE
Has only got four days left to
live--
BONKERS is crushed.
VON DRAKE
Unless ve find ze cure first, dat is!
BONKERS perks up.
MIRANDA
The cure for what, though?
VON DRAKE
Dis.
He holds up a picture of a glowing eraser being wielded by a human wearing
50's era clothing.
VON DRAKE
De guy in ze picture is
legendary toon animator
Tex Avery. In his hand
you see de Eraser, ze
only ting other dan
dat mythical 'dip' schtuff
wat can completely erase
a toon, permanently and
forever, even.
BONKERS
And Negaduck's got his
hands on it!
CUT TO TWO-TONE WORLD
TWO-TONE WORLD is a portion of Toontown done soley in black-and white. The
toons here are all, for the most part, black and white, and everything here
sings or dances, just like in 30's animation.
Everything is normal in the streets until a low RUMBLING noise can be heard.
LIQUIDATOR arches over Two-Tone World like a Tidal Wave! MEGAVOLT is surfing
the wave, using a mechanical arm to wield the Eraser, wiping out everything
in sight!
The tidal wave CRASHES over Two-Tone World, and dissipates. Nothing is left
but a lone granite statue of Steamboat Willie, upon which NEGADUCK scrawls
in red, 'NEGADUCK WUZ HERE'.
LIQUIDATOR is holding the ERASER with a cloth, and it is obvious the tool
is much smaller than before.
NEGADUCK
That should get their attention.
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
FADE TO BLACK
END OF ACT I
ACT II
FADE IN to a shot of downtown Toontown as seen through a window. We can
see THE THREE LITTLE PIGS performing a skit on the sidewalk for change.
TOM of Tom and Jerry fame is dropping Anvils on his own head for a few
cents. JERRY is deperately trying to hand out business cards to anyone
who will take one.
PULL BACK A BIT to show MICKEY MOUSE on the other side of the window,
obscured in shadow, closing his eyes and lowering his head. As he pulls
some curtains closed we
CUT TO THE STREET OUTSIDE THE WINDOW, where
GOOFY is walking down the street slowly, giving money to every down-and-out
toon he sees. He looks across the street at many faded toon mansions,
each with their blinds closed, as if trying to block out the problems
around them.
GOOFY
(sotto)
Ah dunno wut's happen'd
tuh this town...
RACK FADE from GOOFY in the distance to BONKERS and MIRANDA, who are moving
further up the street.
BONKERS is moving slowly, acting really distracted. He sees a billboard
with FAWN's picture on it, and he stops, sitting on the edge of the sidewalk.
MIRANDA stops and squats down next to him.
MIRANDA
Bonkers... you can't let
yourself be this depressed--
not right now, anyway.
BONKERS
(sniffling)
And why not? My number one
sun, my only reason for
bein' is laid up in some
hospital with only FOUR
DAYS TO LIVE! WAHHHHHHHHH!
MIRANDA puts a hand on BONKERS' shoulder.
MIRANDA
There's still hope! Professor
Von Drake says he might be
able to find a cure in time.
Besides, I need you at your
toony best if we're ever
going to have a shot at
stopping Negaduck.
BONKERS
Negaduck's got the Eraser,
Miranda! He could rub me out
in a second!
A FADED, almost TWO-TONE RABBIT in scuzzy clothing passes by, wearing a
sign on his back and front that says "DOOMSDAY NOW"
RABBIT
Only Six Days to the end
of everything...
Six days...
BONKERS barely pays attention to him. The RABBIT walks off.
BONKERS
You got that wrong, buddy.
It's four days.
MIRANDA looks at BONKERS perplexed. She sympathizes with him but needs him
on task. She has an idea.
MIRANDA
Bonkers! Remember that movie
you told me about once? 'Pain
Wish in New York?'
BONKERS
Yeah... it was my first acting
role. The director hated my voice
so much he re-dubbed it. I sounded
like I had helium in my lungs!
MIRANDA
You had to play this guy who
turned vigilante to avenge the
kidnapping of his canary, remember?
BONKERS
Yeah... it wasn't a very good plot.
Chuck Norris and Charles Bronson
just came outta nowhere at the end
to save me...
MIRANDA
The point is... in that movie, you
didn't let grief get the better of
you... you took action!
BONKERS thinks about this for a second.
BONKERS
Miranda, that was a movie. This is
REAL LIFE! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
MIRANDA has had it. There's a time and place for grief, and this isn't it.
She needs BONKERS up to speed.
MIRANDA
BONKERS! Do you want to be
a knight in shining armor
for Fawn, or not?
BONKERS
Of course I do... but...
BONKERS sobs. His tears are beginning to flood the street.
MIRANDA
Then straighten up and fly
right, officer! We can't
save Fawn if you're here weeping and
CAUSING TRAFFIC ACCIDENTS!
A car skids on the tear-water in the street and slams into an ICE CREAM CART.
BONKERS jumps up, stands upright, and salutes!
BONKERS
Ma'am yes Ma'am! I will
not allow my crippling
sense of helpless grief
impede this criminal
investigation, ma'am!
MIRANDA sighs. She stands up, just as two SHORT criminals wearing paper bags
over their heads WHIZZ BY on skateboards! One of them GRABS BONKERS' hat!
BONKERS
HEY! That was my favorite
hat!
A SIREN pops up out of BONKERS' head! He JUMPS into the banged up ICE CREAM
CART, which rolls forward and starts to go DOWNHILL. JITTERS pops up from
the front of the cart.
BONKERS
Hiya, Jitters!
JITTERS
Oh no.
JITTERS leaps from the cart, flying in the path of an ONCOMING TRUCK and
SPLATTING ON ITS GRILL! As it drives off, we hear:
JITTERS
I hate my liiiiiiiiiiiiifffffffffffffffffeeee....
BONKERS' ICE CREAM CART is bounding down the sloping road. He's catching
up with the skateboarding CRIMINALS, who are running on the sidewalk.
PAN RIGHT to show an almost breathless MIRANDA trying to keep up.
As the chase continues, we pass by several famous toons who are doing
streetside photo shoots for coloring books and others who are working
menial jobs at stores and restaurants all over Toontown. The idea is that
everyone who used to be anyone is now basically struggling to make ends
meet.
BONKERS reaches out with one hand, stretching it out longer and longer in
the hopes of grabbing hold of one of the CRIMINALS. He instead catches
a LIGHT POLE, and jerks backwards, bringing the ICE CREAM CART around
with him! He begins wrapping around the pole until his face is sticking out
and the ICE CREAM CART comes rushing in SMASHING IT!
MIRANDA, totally out of breath, makes it to BONKERS. The Two Criminals are
standing a few yards away, laughing-- until LT. GRATING grabs them both
by the neck and lifts them into the air!
GRATING
BOBCAT!
He grabs BONKERS' hat from one of the CRIMINALS.
I think this belongs to you.
BONKERS, still dizzy, wobbles over to GRATING and takes the hat.
BONKERS
Thanks, Lieutenant.
GRATING nods, and shoves the two CRIMINALS onto the ground.
GRATING
Now, let's see who you two hoods
really are under these *fabulous*
disguises.
GRATING lifts up the bag, revealing two small kids that look like
MICKEY MOUSE!
GRATING
This cloning thing's gone a bit too
far!
BONKERS
Morty and Ferdie?
MIRANDA and GRATING look at each other, mouthing the two names.
BONKERS
(sternly)
Mortimer and Ferdinand Mouse! Tell
me what you were doin' out here
stealin' other people's hats or
I'm gonna tell yer uncle what
you've been doin!
MORTY
Gee, Mr. Bobcat, we're sorry. But
our boss told us to steal things
for him--
FERDIE
--real specific things too.
MIRANDA
What sorta things?
GRATING
And who's yer boss?
MORTY
Stuff like a policeman's hat,
a giant candy cane, two pairs
of purple boxer shorts and
a Santa suit.
FERDIE
An' the guy who told us to get
'em--
MORTY
(eyes wide)
Or Else!
FERDIE
(nodding)
Or ELSE, was...
CUT TO THE ABANDONED WAREHOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE - DUSK
QUACKERJACK
(v.o.)
NEGADUCK!
NEGADUCK comes out of nowhere. He's wearing a fake white beard and has
strapped a pillow to his chest.
NEGADUCK
What? Can't you see I'm
getting all jolly for the
holiday season?!
NEGADUCK places a TOMMY GUN in the pillow.
QUACKERJACK
Those two mice got all the
stuff you wanted! They're
bringing it straight to
us!
NEGADUCK
Excellent.
CUT TO THE EXT. of the WAREHOUSE. MIRANDA and BONKERS are watching through
binoculars as MORTIE and FERDIE enter, carrying a bag with all the items
NEGADUCK wanted. BONKERS is agitated.
BONKERS
Can we bust 'em now, Miranda?
Can we, huh huh huh?
MIRANDA
It'll be easier to get them once
they're out in the open, Bonkers.
BONKERS
But MIRANDA, they've got the
Eraser in there! I just know
that if we had it, Professor
Von Drake could make an
antidote for FAWN!
BONKERS is bouncing up and down now.
MIRANDA
BONKERS! Calm DOWN!
CUT TO INT. WAREHOUSE
LIQUIDATOR is a puddle of metallic water on the floor. Small ripples go
through him. PUSH IN as we hear him hear a tinny "BONKERS...DOWN!"
LIQUIDATOR
Hello, hello, Hello!
Limited Time Only! Think you've
got unwanted company? Then
call Megavolt's High Voltage
Pest Detection Service!
NEGADUCK nods to MEGAVOLT, who taps his goggles.
MEGAVOLT
Activating... NIGHT VISION
apparatus!
FLOODLIGHTS snap on all around the WAREHOUSE! BONKERS and MIRANDA are
illuminated plain as day!
NEGADUCK
You IDIOT! Night Vision lets you see
in the DARK! Now they know we know
they're out there!
MEGAVOLT doesn't get it.
NEGADUCK GRABS MORTY AND FERDIE! He walks up to a window and yells out
NEGADUCK
All right, cops! Make one wrong move
and these kiddies get fed to one of
Bushroot's more carnivorous plant
friends!
MIRANDA
(yelling)
Just let the kids go!
NEGADUCK
Don't worry! The little tykes and I
are just going on a little trip,
that's all-- to a place near and
dear to everyone's heart these days...
WACKYTOONS! And if any of you think
about showin' up--
QUACKERJACK bounds in, holding up the ERASER!
NEGADUCK
Everybody gets RUBBED OUT!
QUACKERJACK
That doesn't include us, right, boss?
NEGADUCK
(sotto)
Shut up, Quackerjack!
QUACKERJACK, BUSHROOT, LIQUIDATOR, MEGAVOLT and NEGADUCK race to the back
of the warehouse, and a yellow and black HELICOPTER smashes out of its roof!
As BONKERS watches the helicopter depart, MIRANDA runs off, getting in the
SQUADCAR (which is a bit more dinged up than we've seen in the past) and
pulling it up in front of BONKERS.
MIRANDA
Come on, Bonkers!
BONKERS jumps in the car, and it races towards the horizon, towards the
rising skyline of Hollywood.
FADE OUT
END OF ACT II
ACT III
CUT IN to the SQUAD CAR screeching to a stop in front of WACKYTOONS STUDIO.
The HELICOPTER can be seen smashed into the roof of the studio. There is
a mass panic, with toons scrambling to get out of the building. BONKERS and
MIRANDA are fighting their way into the building.
WACKY WEASEL is pushing past BONKERS and MIRANDA. He stops when he notices
which way they are going, and gets in BONKERS' way.
WACKY WEASEL
Hey, just where do you think
you're going, Bonkers?
BONKERS
We've got to stop Negaduck!
WACKY WEASEL
It's too late for that, Bobcat!
MIRANDA
What do you mean?
WACKY WEASEL
He's already rubbed out D.J.!
BONKERS drops to the ground, dumbstruck.
BONKERS
No more Duck Jones?
MIRANDA, realizing that BONKERS is totally out of it, pushes forward
and gets into the studio.
The Interior of the Studio is similar to that of a high school gymnasium,
with bleachers on the left and right, and a massive stage in the front.
The whole place is decked out for a Christmas Party. NEGADUCK is on the
stage, holding up a terrified LOUIE. He's holding the ERASER, much smaller
now, next to LOUIE'S head.
NEGADUCK
And next up on the Erasing Block,
everyone's fave ape, Louie!
MIRANDA draws her gun, aiming it at NEGADUCK!
MIRANDA
Hold it, Negs! Put the Eraser down!
NEGADUCK grins.
NEGADUCK
Why, certainly, Officer WRONG!
NEGADUCK throws the Eraser at Miranda! It hits her, and bounces off!
LIQUIDATOR bursts forwards and grabs the Eraser before MIRANDA can grab it!
NEGADUCK growls.
NEGADUCK
Why is it that no truly great
anti-toon weapon EVER works on
the humans!?
He sighs.
Oh well. Back to more traditional
methods. Boys-- GET 'ER!
LIQUIDATOR snakes around MIRANDA'S FEET, turning into SOLID CHAINS! She
falls forward, inches away from one of BUSHROOT'S carnivorous plants!
QUACKERJACK stands above her, holding a dangerous looking pair of CHATTERING
TEETH! MEGAVOLT just stands there, crackling electricity and looking bad.
MIRANDA
BONKERS! HELP!
NEGADUCK shakes his head.
NEGADUCK
Will somebody please make
her SHUT UP?
CUT TO EXT. WACKYTOONS
Most of the fleeing toons are gone, but BONKERS and a few others remain,
including GOLIATH and the other Gargoyles, BALOO and SCROOGE McDUCK.
One of BONKERS' ears perks up. He hears MIRANDA'S call for help.
BONKERS
We have to go in there and
help Miranda!
SCROOGE
Aye, laddie-- but how? All me
security teams are toons. That
blasted Eraser could easily
wipe them off the map before
they could get within an inch
of yer friend!
GOLIATH
There can be no security without
risk, my friends. And these days,
there is precious little security.
BALOO
I say we charge in there an' give
'em what for!
GOLIATH
Noble sentiments, my friend-- but
what we need is a strategy.
SCROOGE
Here! Where's that toon cop gone off
to, then?
CUT TO INT. WACKYTOONS.
BONKERS is fleeing from LIQUIDATOR and dodging ELECTRIC BOLTS from MEGAVOLT!
SWINGING upwards on a string of CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, he gets MEGAVOLT to ZAP
LIQUIDATOR!
LIQUIDATOR
Haha! New IMPROVED Liquidator
has no problems with electricity--
in faaaact... Electricity makes
LIQUEE HAPEEE!
LIQUIDATOR lunges for BONKERS, but the Bobcat manages to bounce off a far
wall and swing around in front of NEGADUCK! He lets go off the Christmas
lights and falls on top of BUSHROOT!
BUSHROOT
(gasping)
The Eraser! Gimme the ERASER!
NEGADUCK frowns and throws it to MEGAVOLT, who catches it with a gloved hand,
only to lose the glove and hand!
NEGADUCK
You idiot! That thing's too hot
to handle!
MEGAVOLT drops the damaged arm, revealing it as a toon prop.
NEGADUCK smirks. The Eraser is right where he wants it-- in front of Bonkers.
NEGADUCK
I know all about the little
condition your frail friend
Fawn happens to be suffering
from... I'd guess that somewhere
in that Eraser there's a cure for it...
BONKERS glares at NEGADUCK. LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT are advancing on him
from behind. He's still squishing BUSHROOT, who is looking pained.
NEGADUCK snaps his fingers.
NEGADUCK
Back off, boys!
LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT look at each other askance.
NEGADUCK
I know what it's like to lose
someone you love, Bobcat... so
I'll let you have that there
Eraser--
BONKERS looks at NEGADUCK suspiciously.
BONKERS
What's the catch?
NEGADUCK
No catch, cop. All you have
to do is... *pick it up*.
LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT break out in evil laughter. Miranda, who is tied
up in the background, realizes what NEGADUCK intends.
MIRANDA
Bonkers! Don't do it! You know
what'll happen to you if you
even touch that thing!
BONKERS
But it's for FAWN...
He reaches a hand out towards the Eraser.
MIRANDA
BONKERS! DON'T!
MIRANDA begins struggling with her bonds. As BONKERS' hand gets closer to
the Eraser, she gets loose! Grabbing her gun, she appears to be aiming
for Bonkers!
MIRANDA
Bonkers! I can't let you
grab that Eraser!
LIQUIDATOR moves to attack MIRANDA, but NEGADUCK waves him off.
NEGADUCK
And what are you going to
do about it, officer?
BONKERS stops going for the Eraser, and asks the camera,
BONKERS
Yeah, what?
MIRANDA cocks her pistol!
NEGADUCK
(with mock concern)
Are you gonna get between
Bonkers and the one thing
he needs to save the most
special person to him in
the whole world? Are you,
his loyal partner, really
gonna do that?
MIRANDA
I guess so. Sorry, partner.
BONKERS lunges for the ERASER! MIRANDA opens fire! Her bullet hits the
Eraser, sending it flying at NEGADUCK!
NEGADUCK dodges, grabbing the Eraser with a piece of cloth. He's enraged.
BONKERS
(sotto)
I was so close...
NEGADUCK
KILL THE HEROES! KILL THEM!
LIQUIDATOR rushes forward, but out of nowhere, GOLIATH flies in and tackles
him! MEGAVOLT gets an ANVIL dropped on him by BALOO, SCROOGE knocks out
QUACKERJACK with his cane, and MIRANDA goes after NEGADUCK!
One of QUACKERJACK's chattering teeth leaps up and grabs the end of SCROOGE'S
cane, yanking it away! NEGADUCK hurls the ERASER at BALOO, RUBBING OUT his
hat! GOLIATH catches the ERASER in one of his wings and drops!
MIRANDA turns to help, only to find LIQUIDATOR and the other criminals
behind GOLIATH and SCROOGE! LIQUIDATOR is holding the ERASER perilously
above SCROOGE'S head!
The other GARGOYLES rush in, knocking the ERASER to the center of the room!
MIRANDA and BONKERS are on one side of the room. LIQUIDATOR and the other
criminals are on the other. GOLIATH, SCROOGE, BALOO and the other GARGOYLES
are in between, but further back.
NEGADUCK growls.
NEGADUCK
You've got one more shot
at this thing, Bobcat.
Don't let HER mess it up.
BONKERS looks at MIRANDA, who notices a trickle of water coming closer to
the ERASER. She shakes her head.
BONKERS
I've got to get that Eraser,
Miranda! Fawn's life depends
on it!
MIRANDA
Can't you see it's a trap?
The trickle of water now surrounds the Eraser, but does not touch it.
PAN DOWN through the floor, where we see the water forming a huge mallet.
PAN back UP, where BONKERS is again leaping for the Eraser!
GOLIATH swoops in, KNOCKING BONKERS out of the way just as the MALLET smashes
the floor, sending the ERASER hurling high up into the air!
BUSHROOT leaps for it, but is knocked out of the way by NEGADUCK, who grabs
it in his cloth-covered hand.
BUSHROOT
Nuts!
NEGADUCK
Stop worrying about the Eraser,
and pay attention to THEM!
NEGADUCK points to the cops.
MIRANDA is holding BONKERS back forcibly. He's scrambling to get to the
Eraser, almost irrational now. A weakened GOLIATH and the others have formed
a semicircular line cutting them off from NEGADUCK and his cronies.
GOLIATH
You two must go now. We will hold the
line until you escape.
MIRANDA
But--
GOLIATH
You must go! NOW!
NEGADUCK is approaching the line of Toons, holding the ERASER up menacingly.
MIRANDA quickly drags BONKERS out of WACKYTOONS as we hear NEGADUCK'S
laughter echo throughout the night.
FADE OUT
END OF ACT III
ACT IV
FADE IN TO THE 34th PRECINCT, READY ROOM
OFFICER STARK is at the central podium, looking bleary-eyed. He yawns.
STARK
The Lt. was supposed to be here to
give the late-night briefing, but
I have no idea where he is. So I
get to do it. Lucky me.
BONKERS and MIRANDA are the only two police officers in attendance, and
they are sitting disturbingly far apart.
STARK
The only one who got out of Wackytoons
intact tonight was Scrooge McDuck, and
that was because Negaduck suddenly got
all upset and fled. Nobody knows why--
he was this close to rubbin' him out.
MIRANDA
Not to mention Wackytoons Studio.
STARK
Exactly. What's more, it seems like
they've started hitting every bridge
in the state-- it's almost like they're
lookin' for something.
CUT TO THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE - UPPER LEVEL
A darkened room bursts into blinding light as a wall panel gives way and the
beam from MEGAVOLT'S light bulb illuminates everything.
NEGADUCK
BINGO, Boys! Megavolt, hit the juice!
The room lights up normally, revealing Darkwing Duck's secret hideout.
The criminals all enter.
NEGADUCK
(babytalk)
Well, Bushroot, here's your
precious liddle compudder!
The COMPUTER is a huge unit, with a screen the size of a decent-sized wall.
BUSHROOT glares at NEGADUCK, who is holding a VERY small piece of ERASER in
a bit of cloth.
BUSHROOT
I really wish you hadn't wasted
all that Eraser rubbing out every
Toon you saw!
NEGADUCK
Oh yeah!? I didn't rub YOU out, now
did I?
BUSHROOT
I doubt there's even enough left there
to manage that!
NEGADUCK
Perhaps you're right.
(dangerously)
How would you like to go through
life minus one HEAD?!
BUSHROOT
Sorry... O Glorious leader.
NEGADUCK
So get this thing analyzed. I
want a liquid version, PRONTO!
BUSHROOT goes for the sample, but NEGADUCK shakes his head.
NEGADUCK
Where does it go?
BUSHROOT is aggravated.
BUSHROOT
Under the sub-particle analyzer.
NEGADUCK looks around at the bewildering array of equipment in the lab.
NEGADUCK
Which would be *where*, exactly?
BUSHROOT absently points to a glowing pedestal. NEGADUCK places the Eraser
on it. The COMPUTER begins to whir and click, displaying more and more
complicated chemical formulae.
NEGADUCK is staring blankly at the screen, getting more and more impatient.
Finally, the screen displays a huge, red skull-and-crossbones pattern.
NEGADUCK grins.
NEGADUCK
That's it... AHAHAHAHAHA!
CUT TO INT. MAYOR KANIFKY'S HOME, where KANIFKY is sitting up watching a
rerun of the LUDICROUSLY LATE SHOW.
LUDICROUSLY LATE SHOW
We'll be right back after these
messages from our sponsor.
KANIFKY
Oh! Darn it, I so do hate
these commericals! I wish
someone would... er... do
something about them!
The TV display flickers. NEGADUCK and crew appear on screen.
NEGADUCK
We interrupt this commercial
to bring you... a ransom demand!
KANIFKY
That's more like it!
(beat)
Wait a minute...
PUSH IN on the screen. NEGADUCK is holding a generic toon over a huge vat.
NEGADUCK
If the city of Hollywood
doesn't deliver total
control of the city to
the Synidcate in ONE
HOUR, all of Toontown's
gonna end up like THIS!
NEGADUCK drops the toon into the vat! We hear a fizzle noise, and then
nothing.
MAYOR KANIFKY picks his phone, putting it to his ear upside down. He quickly
corrects for this.
KANIFKY
Operator? Get me the 34th
Precinct... NOW!
CUT TO the 34th PRECINCT's aging computer lab. DENNIS and STARK are playing
back a copy of NEGADUCK'S rasnsom demand on a computer. BONKERS is barely
paying attention, more interested in examining a photo of FAWN he is holding.
MIRANDA is paying close attention.
DENNIS
If we use a little digital
magic, *poof*, we can get
rid of Negaduck and company,
taking them right out of the
commercial.
MIRANDA
If only it was that simple
in real life...
STARK
No kiddin'. But anyhow, we've
now got a picture of the room
they were standin' in. Does it
look at all familar to you?
MIRANDA looks at the background, which is Darkwing Duck's secret hideout.
MIRANDA
Nope. Never seen anything like
it before.
BONKERS absently looks up. Nonchalantly, he says
BONKERS
What, you never watched Darkwing
Duck? That's his secret hideout.
Everybody knows that.
MIRANDA turns to face BONKERS.
MIRANDA
You wouldn't happen to know
where this secret hideout is,
would you?
BONKERS
Even if I did, I wouldn't
tell you! You'd probably
just let them get away
with the Eraser again!
MIRANDA frowns.
MIRANDA
Bonkers, you wouldn't have
gotten ten feet with that
Eraser even if I had let you
pick it up! You'd be rubbed
out!
BONKERS
Better to be rubbed out in
the line of duty than to
let Fawn down!
MIRANDA thinks for a few seconds. DENNIS and STARK are making phone calls
in the background.
MIRANDA
Look. Every time we've seen
Negaduck or one of the others
hold onto that thing, they've
had a cloth or some other
real-world material protecting
their hands. Maybe that's what
you need to protect yourself.
BONKERS perks up a bit.
BONKERS
Are you sayin' that if I wore
gloves or sumthin', that you'd
let me go after the Eraser
again?
MIRANDA thinks a bit more.
MIRANDA
I think I'm going to have to
say no again, Bonkers.
BONKERS looks crushed, but MIRANDA whispers something in his ear, and
he brightens considerably.
DENNIS gets off the phone.
DENNIS
I got a lead for you guys.
Any of you remember Launchpad
McQuack? He used to be Scrooge
McDuck's personal pilot until
he started working on the Darkwing
Duck show. He says he might know
where Darkwing's hideout is.
MIRANDA
Where can we meet him?
The sound of a rapidly approaching plane can be heard. MIRANDA looks up at
the ceiling and realizes what is about to happen.
MIRANDA
(yelling)
Everybody, SCATTER!
A red BIPLANE slams into the computer lab! LAUNCHPAD McQUACK leaps out of
the flaming wreckage.
LAUNCHPAD
(squavely)
Nobody worry...
He grins. LIGHT glints off his teeth.
I'm okay.
Unlike the LAUNCHPAD of old, this LAUNCHPAD is an almost debonair sort,
having made it big in the film industry.
LT. GRATING runs in. He glares at the wreckage.
GRATING
You idiot! The Helipad is
three levels u..u...
Launchpad McQuack!
GRATING shakes his hand.
GRATING
You're that guy that does--
LAUNCHPAD
All his OWN stunts. Yes, I
know. Nice to meet you too,
whoever you are.
GRATING grins.
GRATING
Lieutenant Frank Q. Grating,
34th Precinct. Listen, uhh...
Mr. McQuack... all of Hollywood's
pretty shook up about the loss
of Darkwing Duck...
LAUNCHPAD's face falls. GRATING eases up a bit.
GRATING
...and I think it's important
you tell me where his secret
hideout is, so we can get to
it before the criminals do.
BONKERS and MIRANDA look at each other quizzically.
BONKERS
Umm... Lt.? The criminals
ALREADY have it, remember?
GRATING starts.
GRATING
They WHAT?!
(beat)
Oh... yeah... umm... well, we
need to GET IT BACK!
So where is it, Mr. McQuack?
LAUNCHPAD ponders for a minute.
CUT TO EXT. GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE - NIGHT
BONKERS and MIRANDA are positioned outside a window looking into Darkwing's
old hideout. NEGADUCK and co. are busy preparing a HUGE vat of Liquid Eraser.
Below, in the water under the bridge, a small boat can be seen pulling up,
too small to be anything important.
MIRANDA looks at BONKERS.
MIRANDA
Go for it, partner.
BONKERS nods, and takes off one of his gloves. Out of his hand, toon claws
extend (he is a BobCAT, remember?), and he places them against the glass.
Turning his hand in a clockwise motion, he cuts through the glass.
MIRANDA grabs the piece of glass before it can fall into the hideout, and
BONKERS replaces his glove.
MIRANDA glares at BONKERS.
MIRANDA
Remember what I said about
going for the Eraser?
BONKERS nods.
MIRANDA nods back, and drops a small TEAR GAS canister down the hole in the
window.
The TEAR GAS grenade falls into the VAT of LIQUID ERASER, where it melts!
MIRANDA does a take.
MIRANDA
What the heck? I thought the
Eraser couldn't affect real
world objects!
From down below, LIQUIDATOR shoots forth an ARM of solid water and GRABS
BONKERS and MIRANDA, yanking them through the window, which shatters, and
they land on the floor in front of the vat!
BUSHROOT
It would appear that Liquid
Eraser is a bit more volatile
than solid Eraser... almost
like a kind of Molecular Acid...
NEGADUCK walks over to MIRANDA, and grabs her by the chin.
NEGADUCK
Well if it isn't Little Miss
Susnshine? Last time my little
anti-toon weapon just bounced
off you--
He yanks off her badge, and tosses it into the VAT, where it dissolves!
NEGADUCK
This time... I think things are
going to be a little different!
He turns to Quackerjack.
NEGADUCK
Quackerjack! Toss her in!
QUACKERJACK advances on MIRANDA! She backs up, but BUSHROOT grabs her!
BONKERS runs to help, but NEGADUCK holds the ERASER in front of him!
NEGADUCK
Uh uh! Bad kitty!
BUSHROOT and QUACKERJACK toss MIRANDA up over the VAT!
FADE OUT
END OF ACT IV
ACT V
FADE IN
MIRANDA is falling towards the VAT! Suddenly, a trail of PURPLE SMOKE blocks
out her image! When it clears, she's gone!
NEGADUCK looks around confusedly.
NEGADUCK
Is she dead? Is she dead?
QUACKERJACK and MEGAVOLT are looking up, at a ledge near the top of the
Command Center. MIRANDA is standing there, next to a wierd-looking DARKWING
DUCK!
MEGAVOLT / QUACKERJACK
I don't think so, boss!
DARKWING looks very different. Much thicker, wider. His eyes are covered
with glowing red lenses, and he's wearing black gloves and boots, not to
mention pants. He is silent.
NEGADUCK
(shocked, afraid)
I- I- I- can't believe this!
I rubbed him out!
NEGADUCK is in shock. BONKERS sees this, and reaches out for the fragment
of ERASER in NEGADUCK'S HAND. MIRANDA sees this and yells out!
MIRANDA
BONKERS!
He GRABS IT!
NEGADUCK shifts his gaze to BONKERS.
NEGADUCK
I hope it was worth it, cop.
Your partner wasn't able to
save you this time!
MUHAHAHAHA!
BONKERS looks at his hand, which is holding the ERASER. IT melts AWAY!
NEGADUCK
AHAHAHAHAHA!
BONKERS' HAND melts away to reveal a piece of cloth, under which is his
REAL HAND!
NEGADUCK
What!? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
BUSHROOT leaps out from nowhere, tackling BONKERS, and grabbing the ERASER
in a protected hand!
NEGADUCK
Good work, Bushboy!
BUSHROOT runs past a waiting NEGADUCK, and to the door, where SHERE KHAN is
standing with some henchmen who are obscured in darkness. He gives it to KHAN.
SHERE KHAN
Excellent work, Mr. Bushroot.
Your diligence will not go
unrewarded.
NEGADUCK cannot believe what he's seeing.
NEGADUCK
BUSHROOT!!
BUSHROOT and SHERE KHAN leave together. The rest of the SYNDICATE MEMBERS are
handily beaten by DARKWING DUCK.
NEGADUCK comes eye to eye with DARKWING, who seems to have grown taller,
since NEGADUCK is now a good three inches shorter than him.
NEGADUCK
(terrified)
How did you...?
DARKWING says nothing, and vanishes in a puff of smoke. BONKERS and MIRANDA
surround NEGADUCK. Police Lights can be seen streaming in the windows.
MIRANDA
What's the antidote for the
Eraser!?
NEGADUCK
There is no antidote!
BONKERS
You're lying! Darkwing
survived!
NEGADUCK
Don't you understand?!
There IS NO ANTIDOTE!
I rubbed DARKWING OUT!
I rubbed him out!
NEGADUCK starts to blither. DENNIS and STARK enter the hideout and take
him away.
MIRANDA puts a consoling hand on BONKERS' shoulder.
MIRANDA
Look, partner. We still
have three days left, and
Darkwing's computer has
the Eraser formula in it.
I'm sure we can make an
antidote from that...
The COMPUTER starts to beep.
COMPUTER
WARNING! LIQUID ERASER
FORMULA UNSTABLE! EXPLOSION
IMMINENT! WARNING!
BONKERS and MIRANDA pull the criminals out of the hideout just as the
Liquid Eraser DETONATES!
FADE TO BONKERS and MIRANDA walking through the debris of DARKWING's
hideout. DENNIS and STARK are packing up what they can in the background.
The SUN is slowly rising in the background.
MIRANDA
Most of the lab's okay, but the
computer's totalled, I'm afraid.
BONKERS is walking slowly, head down.
MIRANDA
Cheer up, partner. We know that
Shere Khan has the Eraser, and
I'm sure we can track him down
in time. We've still got three
days left, right? Right?
BONKERS looks up at MIRANDA sadly.
BONKERS
Right.
MIRANDA
Besides, Darkwing survived...
I mean, maybe this erasure
thing isn't as permanent as
it looks!
BONKERS perks up, a ray of hope sustaining him.
BONKERS
You know, maybe you're right!
CUT TO A DARKENED ROOM
DARKWING DUCK walks slowly across the room, eyes glowing in the darkness.
He sits down at a chair, and sighs, beak unmoving.
DARKWING raises one arm and looks at his gloved hand. Flexing all four
fingers, he nods.
Taking another hand, he gets ready to pull off the glove, stopping for a
moment to look at the TV.
TV ANCHORWOMAN
Yet another robbery was foiled tonight
by Darkwing Duck. The Dark Warrior against
crime has returned to us! His costume may
have changed, but he's our hero just the
same!
RACK FADE from the TV to the GLOVE, which is being removed, revealing a
flesh-colored hand with FIVE fingers inside it.
THE END
But TO BE CONTINUED